HELP! My Wife Refuses to Have Sex.

HELP! My Wife Refuses to Have Sex.

Here is a letter that I received from a prospective client.

Dear Rebekah:

I am 60 and my wife is 48. The problem is, she no longer wants to have sex. We have a great relationship in so many

Please Honey, it's a special day!

photo courtesy of Nancy Adiar via Flickr (creative commons license)

ways, we enjoy each others’ company and we have been married a long time. In the early days, we were f*&$ing like rabbits. Now, she will give me a blow job once in a while and seems content to have this part of our lives die off, but I’m not. I masturbate frequently but it’s not fulfilling. I want to have sex with my wife, hot and heavy like we used to. What can I do?

Frustrated Husband

The Cure for Low Female Libido Step 1 – Get Curious

Dear FH:

I’m so glad you reached out for help. No one has to suffer a decreased or non-existent sex life if they are willing to open up and talk about what they want. Chances are, underneath your wife’s resistance is a desire for sex too. Who wants to win the battle for LESS fun? Bravo to you for being the one willing to bring this into the open. The first step to bringing sexual intimacy back into your relationship is communication. Instead of feeling defensive and taking her lack of interest personally, get curious. Why doesn’t she want sex? If you flat out ask her, with curiosity rather than defensiveness, you may get some clues as to  how you can improve things. If you are living with a woman who has a hard time identifying and communicating her needs, you will have to do some guessing.

Read my whole response HERE. . .

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